The Wise Wife Letters

I want to tell you a story from the archives of my separation. It’s one that came back to me as I was preparing this week’s podcast episode where I answered a Wise Wife question about anointing oil.    Tim and I were estranged. Not just separated-but-still-talking. I mean truly estranged. Distanc...

When Tim and I first got married, I had an expectation I never said out loud. I didn't even fully admit it to myself. But I believed it. I thought marriage was going to turn him into a spiritual leader. I thought we would suddenly pray together at night, read the Bible together in the mornings, ...

  There was a season in my marriage where everything in the natural said, this is over. The patterns hadn’t changed, the evidence stacked up, and fear got really loud. 😟 Not just emotional and overwhelming, but everything also felt urgent. “Fix this.”“Do something.”“Prepare for the worst.” And u...

There was a season in my marriage where I took on a role I was never assigned. I became the Marriage Parole Officer 👮🏻   I didn't call it that at the time, of course. I called it "trying to help." But it looked a lot like keeping mental records of his failures, correcting him, checking up on his...

Submission. For a lot of women, that word alone brings up tension, fear, resistance, or maybe even anger. And honestly, I get it. Because most of what we’ve been taught about submission falls into two extremes: One says: “He’s in charge, no matter what.”The other says: “I answer to God, not him.”...

I got my hair cut today and, although I never do anything but a basic trim, I fully expected the normal “that looks nice!” compliment from my husband when I walked in the door. And he said nothing. Not because he was being insensitive or unkind – he was simply distracted with work while moving th...