Submission Isn’t What You Think (And That’s the Problem)

Submission.

For a lot of women, that word alone brings up tension, fear, resistance, or maybe even anger.

And honestly, I get it.

Because most of what we’ve been taught about submission falls into two extremes:

One says: “He’s in charge, no matter what.”
The other says: “I answer to God, not him.”

And somewhere in the middle, women are exhausted, confused, and quietly asking:

“How would I even submit in this situation?”

I remember those seasons in my own marriage, the ones that felt unfair.

When my husband made financial decisions that impacted our entire household…
When I felt the pressure to “just comply” in order to keep the (fake) peace...
When everything in me wanted to step in, correct, fix, and control the outcome.

And yet, those were the very moments that became turning points.

Not because I fixed him… but because I got out of God’s way.

Every time I chose strength and dignity over fear and finger-pointing, God moved.

Sometimes immediately. Sometimes years later.

And He always protected me in the process.

Here’s the truth most people miss:

Biblical submission is not control… and it’s not passivity.

It’s not:

• Managing your husband

• Letting him do whatever he wants

• Silencing yourself to “keep the peace”

And it’s definitely not fear-based compliance.

Instead - 

Biblical submission is a Spirit-led position rooted in the faith that God is a good Father who wants what’s best for you, your husband, and the larger story arch of your legacy.

It’s choosing to honor God while releasing control over outcomes. Trusting Him to pull through for you when the time is right.